A restart?

Things have been good for me the last 6 or so months. I tend not to sit and write on here when good things are happening. So all those other lags in my blog are actually similar situations. Good times make me not put words on the screen. That isn't surprising considering the reasons for this blog and what drives my fingers to type.

What is happening in my life that is so good? Well I have been able to basically relax the last several months. The small amounts of stress I did allow into my life have all disappeared, replaced by even less stressful things.
My debt is now 100% paid off. Yeah the event in my life that started me on the path of creating this blog is now completely behind me. The emotional and intellectual stuff around that event have long been 'taken care of' and the lessons learned over that time are integrated into me. But, now that the money side of things is all cleared up, I feel like I am finally free of everything that happened, minus the knowledge I gained of course.
My job took a minor turn toward a more simple 8-4 almost responsibility free position getting paid the same money. Even if it is exactly the same position I had before but in a more hospitable environment. I can forget about work when I leave work now and spend more time at home. With my new found time freedom I have taken it to get caught up with TV shows and movies I hadn't finished watching. Started cranking up side business work to make some extra money.
I have also started dating someone. Well started dating isn't the correct description... I have spend EVERY weekend with her since I met her. She quickly became a reason to have time off work and not work 10 hours every day and at a time when I had the ability to take that time. I have fallen for her and she for me. We just seem to click, there is strong feelings between us but they don't seem to cloud judgment like I have experienced in the past with prior 'heat of the moment', as I call them, relationships. Something just seems more complete this time. I am all smiles when I think of her and it is a little unnerving the draw we have to eachother. Almost like fate really existed. I won't go down that idea fork road today...
I am also moving in a few short weeks. Really close to the new office location, actually inside Indy, the city that pretends to be a big city, but still better than out in BFE where I am now. I really do miss Phoenix. It is also cheaper to live in a nicer place in Indy compared to BFE. Rent isn't cheap around here at all anyway. Cost of living in this area is very high considering where you are, what is available, and the surroundings. A step up is still better than nothing.
All of this has also created issues and doubts about some things in life as well. Debt free, decent job, a significant other, and a better place to live. It made me start thinking about what is next... what should I start planning on doing next. Start working on a better job, more money so I can actually save some of it and retire at an age where I can still enjoy a few years of freedom from the daily grind. Should I be content for a while just existing and relax my entire self before plotting the next course!
What shall I choose... Who knows...

As for right this moment, I have a few friends out in the world that I miss, I am going to start reconnecting with my stress free time. I am also going to get back on here more, because just because I am happy doesn't mean I can't still write a decent blog. :)

Andrew

P.S. this is a new blog location, I migrated it to a completely new service to help integrate some of my other social and interwebs things into it. So far I can't complain. :)

The 1 year old

I am a proud 1 year old infant blogger! It has been an up and down adventure through my thoughts and ideas displayed out here in the cloud. I have learned a lot about myself through this time and I have undoubtedly shown more of myself to many of you than I ever expected to. This was not my intention when I started to blog all those months ago. I started because I needed a constructive way to express feelings and thoughts and I never intended to publish them. I needed a place to go where my thoughts could be worked though in a way that wouldn't cause any problems. Making these public was at first an act of aggression, but it didn't have the effect I was looking for. Instead, it felt like I had dumped all my inner feelings and just let them all go. That feeling Of release is addicting and I am still doing it today. There are a lot of you that might read this blog now that didn't know me back then. So this may be a shock to you that when I started doing this... it truly saved me from myself! Now it wasn't the only thing that saved me, but without the blog over the long term I know I would not be the person I am.

Since I have started blogging my writing has grown and changed as I have grown and changed. I have learned to share emotions and thoughts and ideas in new ways. I am still am infant in my ability to write and share, but, for someone that truly hates writing I do fairly well, in my opinion. Well I should say used to hate writing! Blogging has taught me how to express myself in words. This is an endlessly valuable lesson and it took me a long time realize my new found ability came from blogging. I even partly contribute last years job promotion to the things I learned while blogging. Overall it isn't easy quantifying what I have learned during this adventure, but the effects on me are easily noticeable for those that knew me before.

I am not claiming that blogging alone changed my life. Allowing one thing to dominate the changes in your life turns you down paths that you will later regret. Many of the things that have shaped me during this adventure I blogged about. And as always some good things some bad things. Today, blogging brings me joy above almost everything else... I said almost!!! There are people and events that bring a joy and liveliness to me that I can't describe in words. So I have never tried. For those that know me best and for those trying to know me better; I hope this blog has shown some insight into me you couldn't get anywhere else. My only advise is to read beyond the words and try to see the ideas behind them. Because those ideas are the real reason why I sit here and type.


Andrew